By: B&S Staff

GRINNELL, IA—Expressing frustration about why his class would include such distressing images, a Grinnell psychology major was reportedly confused yesterday as to why the unit on Hermann Rorschach’s eponymous inkblot test was just a series of pictures of rejection letters from prominent graduate programs around the country. 

The student, Neal Adams `23, is a psychology major enrolled in Professor Marian Galli’s PSY-410-01: The History of Psychoanalysis spoke with B&S reporters in one of several exclusive interviews given to news sources after his ordeal: 

“I understand that classes sometimes have to take us out of our comfort zone, but just showing the whole class a bunch of ‘Dear Neal, we regret to inform you that we will not be able to offer you admission to our graduate program in applied psychology’ letters honestly seems a little harsh. Also, I don’t really understand how it relates to the topics we’re currently studying. I think the syllabus said that this unit was on the unconscious mind and something called pareidolia? I kind of thought that Dr. Galli was pulling a practical joke or something because she found out that I didn’t do the readings. But after like the fifth slide – I think that one was from Berkeley – I really stopped finding it funny. And no one even called her out on it… I’m sorry I need to take a break, can you cut this part from what you publish?”

Several other students in the class reported a similar phenomenon. The B&S spoke with Janet Stevenson `23, Neal’s lab partner and our anonymous source in the class:

“So yeah, I was sitting across from Neal when Galli put up the Rorschach slides and Neal turned white as a sheet and started muttering to himself. I think I remember him saying something like ‘University of Phoenix regrets to inform me… how is that even possible?’ I don’t know what got him so riled up, Dr. Galli had projected a bunch of embarrassing texts from my ex up on the board. I have do idea how she got them but I figured it must be some sort of sick punishment for not doing the reading.”

Attempts to secure an interview with Dr. Galli were unsuccessful after several reporters remembered they didn’t have time to do this shit with everything else they had assigned for classes. However, in pursuit of journalistic perfection, the B&S was able to spare a couple interns to send to Dr. Galli’s class where they could view the slides in question and report back. 

Unfortunately, this too failed to provide any additional developments in the story, with interns reporting various contradictory sightings including “my parents looking at me disapprovingly,” “a note saying I should’ve done real journalism with the S&B,” and “like a splotchy butterfly or something.”

At press time several students had switched out of Dr. Galli’s class and into the competing PSY-410-02: The Science of Fun! with Dr. Phillips, only to be immediately assigned a fifteen-page research paper on the mechanics of pleasure causing molecules in the brain.